Thursday, April 9, 2009

No Nursing Home for Us!


We're checking into the Holiday Inn! With the average cost for a nursing home care costing $188.00 per day, there is a better way when we get old and feeble. We have already checked on reservations at the Holiday Inn. For a combined long term stay discount and senior citizen discount, it's $49.23 per night. That leaves $138.77 a day for: breakfast, lunch and dinner in any restaurant we want, or room service, laundry, gratuities and special TV movies. Plus, they provide a swimming pool, a workout room, a lounge and washer-dryer. Most have free toothpaste and razors, and all have free shampoo and soap.



$5 worth of tips a day will have the entire staff scrambling to help you. They treat you like a customer, not a patient. There is a city bus stop out front,and seniors ride free. The handicap bus will also pick you up (if you fake a decent limp).






To meet other nice people, call a church bus on Sundays.








For a change of scenery, take the airport shuttle bus and eat at one of the nice restaurants there. While you're at the airport, fly somewhere. Otherwise, the cash keeps building up.
It takes months to get into decent nursing homes. Holiday Inn will take your reservation today. And you are not stuck in one place forever, you can move from Inn to Inn, or even from city to city. Want to see Hawaii ? They have a Holiday Inn there too.

TV broken? Light bulbs need changing? Need a mattress replaced? No problem. They fix everything, and apologize for the inconvenience.


The Inn has a night security person and daily room service. The maid checks to see if you are okay. If not, they will call the undertaker or an ambulance. If you fall and break a hip, Medicare will pay for the hip, and Holiday Inn will upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your life.



And no worries about visits from family. They will always be glad to find you, and probably check in for a few days mini-vacation. Or, the kids could pay for a nursing home policy to protect THEIR inheritance. (Never understood why we save so that they can have more. Thought that is why we paid for college--so they could provide for themselves.)


The grand kids can use the pool.






What more can you ask for? So, when we reach that golden age, we'll face it with a grin.







Just forward all our email to:


For a few $ more you can upgrade to BEST WESTERN

♈ ♈ ♈ ♈ ♈




Libby at Neas Nuttiness is handing out awards to her crazy friends, so of course I picked it up.

Thanks, Libby, I think?

I believe in sharing, so if you're feeling a bit "off," go ahead and take the award for your blog. From me to thee!

42 comments:

Becky said...

I like this idea, Sally. The hubby traveled a lot before he retired, and some of the most stress-free times I had were when I stayed in the motel with him. No laundry, no cleaning.... :)

Thanks for starting my day with a smile.

jlshall said...

This is the best idea I've seen in - well, forever! I'm looking around for a Holiday Inn near a major mall so I can spend my Golden Years shopping 'til I drop.

Picket said...

Hey I need to make a note of this for my kids..the always said they'd put me in the nicest nursing home but I like this place better! lol lol That's what I love about you girl..you are always looking out for our best interest! lol lol Have a great day Sally!

Chaitra said...

Wow holiday inn is a cool idea!Much more a happy place then a nursing home would be.Nice planning Sal ;)

Coloradolady said...

Goodness...this was really cute! Made me laugh. I think you might be on to something....beats the nursing home any day!

Have a great Easter weekend.

sara said...

I think this is a great idea!! Especially if the holiday inn in is florida...because I WILL retire by the beach! :)

Knitty said...

Will we get chocolates on our pillows at night? :)

Diane@A Picture is Worth.... said...

Hi Sally,
The Holiday Inn sure beats the nursing home. You have me convinced! LOl

Have a great day!

Betsy from Tennessee said...

Cute Sally... And unfortunately, it's TRUE---when compared to any nursing home or facility.. Also--most of the time, you can also get a FREE breakfast. You can eat and eat and eat----and even take some to your room for lunch and dinner. SO--your meals are paid for also... HA HA HA...

Great post.
Hugs,
Betsy

Diane of Crafty Passions said...

That's one funny post!!
Sure makes you think to dosen't it!
Happy Easter
Diane

Barbara H. said...

Sounds good to me!!

Karen said...

I don't need to go anywhere else--you always make me smile! :o) Happy Easter!

char72 said...

Sounds like a great idea to me. I've heard before that it is cheaper to live in a hotel than a nursing home. I've never seen it explained so well. LOL
Charlotte

Neas Nuttiness said...

OMGosh - this is absolutely BRILLIANT!

I have a son who works for Marriott, maybe he could get us an even better deal at a Residence Inn. Then I could cook if I felt like it!

You should get a Nobel Prize for this idea!!!!!!!!!

Clif said...

Great idea. Charlotte and I may be needing this soon. That last picture of you and Johnny is great.

Cathy said...

Sounds like a great idea to me, Sally. :)

Darlene said...

I'll definitely be checking out the Holiday Inn when the time comes....LOL

Sheri said...

Oh that's TOO funny!!

Barbara said...

Sally, I don't use Windows Live Writer, but I did some research for you. See if you can find how to use it with this page - it should show you how to get back to YOUR SPACE.

http://www.windowslive.com/connect/post/gadgetgran.spaces.live.com-Blog-cns!2418D1CD90C52C20!1481.entry

Susan said...

Sounds great! I also heard of a lady that stayed on the same cruise ship and just kept booking cruise after cruise. Good food and lots of it and travel! Makes sense, doesn't it?

Happy To Be said...

Oh Sally I got my bag all packed...I seen this one before and even told my kids about this...plus you have someone to put clean sheets on your bed daily ha ha!! May you have a wonderful Easter dear friend...hugs and smiles Gl♥ria

Stephanie said...

Oh how funny! Still giggling!!

Robynn's Ravings said...

YOU are a GENIOUS girl!! Libby sent me over and I LOVE THIS. TRULY. I feel so much better in this economy knowing I have a plan now. :)

salmagundi said...

Great post!! I will seriously consider this alternative - sounds like a great nursing home to me. Have a blessed Easter week. Sally

Ashley ~ said...

Good post*! Thanks for the smiles*!

_Ashley ~

Raggedy Girl said...

Hi:
I was just stopping by to see what you were up to. For some silly reason my hand, which was so much better, is really hurting today so I am not up to typing. So I made this little message to let you know I still came by...and I loved your post because I always do!

Roberta Anne...The Raggedy Girl

Ruthie said...

That is hysterically funny! But who will help with the showers when you get too old??? :)
Smiles.

Mrs. B. Silly said...

Woohoo, Holiday Inn here I come!
I like that crazy award, I do believe I am fully qualified so I'm going to be taking that one with me. Thanks, Bridget

Marjorie (Molly) Smith said...

LOL, sounds like a plan to me. Ouch about your back, not being able to walk was bad enough, but not being able to set up is terrible. They are wanting to do 2 hip replacements, but after what I went through with my knee I'm fighting it as long as I can, DH had built me a computer desk with a place for the chair to slide under it..........he surprised me with a reclining desk chair, after I got well enough to get out of bed...I could set up, just couldn't walk, had to keep leg elevated. I think he wished he could take the chair back...lol...

Becky said...

I was rollin' through this whole post! LOL. I think you are on to something! I love it. I'm going to look into it right away... never too early to prepare.

bj said...

OOO, Sally...how fu this post is today. I LOVE the idea, too..I've also heard one about staying on a continous cruise!! woo hoo....

jeanne said...

Sally, this post is a classic. I'll take the Holiday Inn route. You have filled us in with all the benefits and I am loving it. You have a great sense of humor Sally. I have laughed while reading each benefit. There is a huge ring of truth to your post. Thanks for a fun post to read today.

Hugs...Jeanne

imjacobsmom said...

Hey Sally, I actually had a patient tell me that she was planning to just stay on a cruise ship for the just the same reasons - LOL! ~ Robyn

Shelia said...

Oh, now the Most Smiling One has me laughing my face off! This was just too funny, Sally! You and Johnny look so nice in your bathing suits! ;)
Congratulations on the award and I thank you very much. I'm taking it home with me.
Have a blessed and happy Easter, sweet friend.
Shelia ;)

Karen said...

Hilarious!
thanks! I needed a smile today!

Theresa @ Take A Sentimental Journey said...

I've read this before and I love it ! I think it's a good ideal !

Homestay Mama said...

Libby from Nees Nuttiness sent me over, and I'm glad she did! You post was a hoot! Since I've already retired, I've got to start thinking about the inevitable! And, I'm thinking your idea is the smartest one I've seen yet! LOL

Deare Diary said...

Sounds like you have given this a lot of thought. Sounds like a good plan to me.
Judy

Diane @ Four Paws and Co said...

Holiday Inn sounds like a great idea! I've also heard of seniors living on cruise ships!

Thanks for the award, it's right up my alley! ☺ Diane

tammy said...

Fantastic idea.

Fifi Flowers said...

That is a great plan!

Joy H said...

Wow what a wonderful idea! Hope you are enjoying your stay!